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2. The Bovine Cantata in B-Flat Major (Just For You) 4. The Napa Valley Mustard Festival 5. The Debate Goes On: Mustard On Your Sandwich 6. Why the World is in Trouble 8. Cutting the Mustard in Mad City 9. Recipe: Mustard and Bacon Soup
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Did you miss getting that special somebody a Valentines Day gift? Do not despair. There is another holiday in February that is a fine occasion for gift giving. Tuesday, February 18, marks the 73rd anniversary of the first flight in an airplane by a diary cow. Her name was Elm Farm Ollie and her historic flight over St. Louis at the International Air Expo remains an inspiration to us all. The custom is to celebrate Elm Farm Ollie Day for the ten days beginning on the anniversary of her flight. As legend has it, she was milked while in the plane but gave only enough milk to last one day. Miraculously, the milk was enough to feed the needy children for TEN DAYS!
May we suggest our “COWS” gift box or our “COWS Deluxe” gift box. Each box contains three mustards that celebrate three of the great cows in history: Bossie Alvarez (first cow to coach a Division I college football team to a Rose Bowl victory); Beulah Thompson (first cow to run for political office), and, of course, Elm Farm Ollie herself. The Elm Farm Ollie mustard label features a photograph of Ollie boarding the Ford TriMotor plane that took her aloft.
GG7 – COWS (Bovines on Broadway) – Three gorgeous Bovine Mustards (9 oz. each). $15.00
GG7a – COWS DELUXE – Our COWS gift box PLUS 3 signature Wisconsin chocolates (Cowpie, Udderfingers, Moo-Chews). Reg. $24.00, Our special treat for you, only $21.00.
You are all familiar with the opera that recounts Ollie’s glorious moment: Madame Butterfat. Below you will find the lyrics to the opera’s memorable “Bovine Cantata in B-Flat Major.” We promise you this: it is a moooving experience.
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2. The Bovine Cantata in B-Flat Major (Just For You)
As promised, here are the lyrics to the “Bovine Cantata in B-Flat Major,” by Moocini. You have permission to reprint them as long as you give credit where credit is due (Barry Levenson, Curator, Mount Horeb Mustard Museum). Get your hankies, out, ‘cause it’s a real tear jerker:
“In 1930 on a cold winter's day Elm Farm Ollie was munching on her hay. The skies above St. Louis were cloudless and deep blue-ie; Though Ollie was a trooper, the hens just would not lay.
Elm Farm was in trouble. Poor old Farmer Brown, His debits were increasing and his profits were way down. If only friend you knew how he loved that little moo cow, You'd weep in your beer, you'd shed a tear, you'd wear a heavy frown.
Near St. Louis City, where calves are so pretty, 'Twas there I first met my sweet Ollie the cow. Through streets old and cobbled, With her dainty hooves she hobbled, Crying: "Whole milk and butter, pasteurized-O!"
Two sharp and shifty salesmen pounded on the door. They made a startling offer that Brown could not ignore: "You'll soon be thick in clover. Why don't you think it over? Just let us take your milk cow and your riches we'll restore."
They had a novel gimmick, even you would not deny, To take a simple moo cow and to fly her through the sky. "Her milk we do desire! Above the clouds we'll fly her. We'll pay you well for what we sell - So what is your reply? (What is your reply?)"
"All we want is Elm Farm Ollie! Fa la la la la la la la la."
Farmer Brown was trembling; he knew he had to choose: Without this needed money he knew Elm Farm he would lose. But he loved that little bovine with her big brown eyes so divine. He hated to part with the light of his heart But he just could not refuse (he could NOT refuse).
They took her to the airfield; she did not understand These wicked city dealers and the scheme that they had planned: A sinful exploitation (with gold their expectation). As she came aboard the engines ROARED; she was soon high over land.
My Ollie flies over St. Louis. My Ollie flies over Racine. My Ollie flies over Milwaukee. O bring back my moo cow to me!
These shady urban merchants thought they had it made. They dreamed of selling "Skymilk" for ten times what they'd paid. But when they squeezed her udder, Miss Ollie gave a shudder! She'd put up a fight in midair flight - SHE WAS NOT AFRAID!
Ollie gave a warning in a voice so bold and stern: "You'd better reconsider or a lesson you will learn. My milk is for the needy (the truly needy), I'll not oblige the greedy." And I would bet when they heard her threat their stomachs surely turned.
"I'll make the biggest cowpie that you have ever seen. So follow well my orders or I will be obscene. The dire consequences, an assault upon your senses. Your claim to fame will be a song of shame:
Those malevolent men in their flying latrine . . . [kazoo solo]
"I will let you milk me but here's what must be done: Put it into cartons as we fly up to the sun. To parachutes connect them, o'er the city we'll eject them, For the children below who need it to grow, now isn't that more fun?"
Our avaricious villains knew that they must pay, And a gentle little moo cow was a heroine, they say. All hungry tots and weak ones, underprivileged kids and meek ones Celebrate that important date: ELM FARM OLLIE DAY (It's a holiday.).
She flies through the air with the greatest of ease Dropping her ice cream, yoghurt and cheese.
[Spoken: There's a moral to this story. It could be a promise or it could be a threat. So be very careful when someone promises you pie in the sky.]
Give my regards to Elm Farm, remember me to Farmer Brown. Tell all the gang behind the chicken coop that Ollie's back in town! Whisper of how that guernsey would truth and justice never betray. Give my regards to all the animals on Elm Farm Ollie Day!
Hello, Ollie. Well, hello, Ollie! It's so nice to have you back here on the farm. You're looking swell, Ollie, can't you tell, Ollie, We've missed your barnyard wit and down-home country charm? We hear the rooster crowin'; Farmer Brown's a glowin'; He tied a yellow ribbon to your stall, so . . . Hear what we're sayin', chickens, get busy layin', chickens, So Ollie won't have to go away [3 times] again!”
That’s all, folks!
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The Mount Horeb Mustard Museum has finally broken through the 4,000 mustard barrier. The unofficial count is now 4,015 mustards. Many of the new mustards came by way of entries in the 2003 World-Wide Mustard Competition and we continue to receive mustards from you, our fans and supporters.
We will do an official audit soon and will report to you on the results.
4,000 mustards – makes you proud to be an American, doesn’t it?
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4. The Napa Valley Mustard Festival
The Curator and Mrs. Mustard will again have the honor of presenting medals to the winners of the World-Wide Mustard Competition at this year’s Napa Valley Mustard Festival. We will be in Napa from March 14-16 and hope to see our California friends there. For more information, visit the official Festival web site at www.mustardfestival.org.
We will announce the winners of the Mustard Competition in next month’s newsletter.
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5. The Debate Goes On: Mustard On Your Sandwich
We received the following email from Robert L. in cyberspace:
“I am searching for any information that supports the placement of mustard on the meat of a sandwich, as opposed to putting the mustard on the bread. I am trying to settle a long-standing argument about the quality of a sandwich based on where you put the mustard. My position is that the condiments were designed to enhance and complement the flavor of the meat, not the bread or the vegetables. Therefore, the mustard (in my view) belongs on the meat directly. Any items that are placed between the mustard and the meat simply defeat the purposed of the condiment somewhat.”
The Curator responded to Mr. L. as follows:
“I disagree with your basic assumption that mustard is put on a sandwich “designed to enhance and complement the flavor of the meat, not the bread or the vegetables.” The reason I cannot accept this premise is threefold: (1) many vegetarians enjoy mustard on meatless sandwiches; (2) I have heard from many people who have reported to me of the pleasures of eating a simple mustard sandwich – i.e. two slices of bread and mustard only; (3) for true mustard lovers, it is the other way around: one eats meats, vegetables and bread as a way of enhancing and complementing the mustard.”
The Curator continued his response with these practical pearls of wisdom:
“The more difficult question, and one of a more technical nature, seems to be the one you raise – whether one should apply the mustard directly to the contents of the sandwich or rather to the top slice of bread. I favor the former technique if the sandwich is being prepared in advance because the sandwich is less likely to be soggy when it is finally eaten. If the sandwich is to be eaten immediately, it makes no difference. If you have a multi-component sandwich – meats plus cheese plus vegetables – AND the sandwich is being made more than ten minutes before it is to be eaten, I agree that it makes sense to apply the mustard to the meat. Add the cheese, THEN MORE MUSTARD, and then the vegetables (lettuce, tomato, onion). A final application of mustard to the bread, immediately before eating, is then appropriate.”
Mr. L. has replied to my email and expressed his disagreement with my disagreement.
We welcome your comments.
(By the way, the Curator is supposed to spend his day on such esoteric mustard issues. Any guesses as to Mr. L’s excuse?)
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6. Why the World is in Trouble
Sandy Ingham, Emeritus Minister of Mustard, noticed an article in the New York Times about a new dance studio in Brooklyn. It is located in an old brick building once occupied by the “Dutch Mustard Company.” Rev. Ingham comments: “Wait a minute – does the world REALLY need another dance studio – at the expense of a mustard factory? I don’t think so. No wonder the world is falling apart.”
Amen, sister! And we miss you.
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We were happy to see actress Frances McDormand featured on the last page of the current issue (March 2003) of Bon Appetit. (We loved her as the so-Minnesota sheriff in “Fargo.”) But we were sorely disappointed when we read that one of her favorite treats is a tomato sandwich (fresh tomatoes from her garden) on white bread with mayonnaise. Mayo? Frances, you are missing out on something very special.
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8. Cutting the Mustard in Mad City
If you are in the Madison area, we recommend a terrific restaurant, “9 East Brasserie,” located in the Hilton downtown at 9 East Wilson Street. Executive Chef James Jens is a mustard fanatic and is not afraid to use mustard generously in his dishes. His seafood cakes with Creole mustard were a big hit on Valentine’s Day. For information or for reservations, call the restaurant at (608) 255-0165.
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9. Recipe: Mustard and Bacon Soup
We discovered this fabulous soup at Restaurant Que Pasa in Oranjestad, Aruba. The chef was kind enough to share it with us, although we have adapted it slightly. We recommend this eclectic and creative restaurant highly.
Mustard and Bacon Soup
4 slices - smoked bacon 1 medium shallot, chopped 2 Tbsp - Pommery Moutarde de Meaux ˝ tsp. - chopped rosemary ˝ tsp. - chopped thyme freshly ground black pepper 4 cups - heavy cream 2 cups - chicken broth (strong) 1 Tbsp. - butter
Cut bacon into small pieces and sweat over medium heat with the chopped shallots, rosemary, and thyme for five minutes. Add mustard, cream, and chicken broth, and simmer over low heat for about five minutes or until hot but not boiling. Add black pepper to taste. If the soup seems too thick, you may thin it with more chicken stock or with water. Garnish with more rosemary and thyme, if desired, or with chopped chives. Just before serving, add the butter.
Serves 4 to 6.
Pommery Moutarde de Meaux is a distinctive whole grained French mustard available from the Mount Horeb Mustard Museum. You may substitute any other French grainy mustard but the taste will not be exactly the same (though still delicious).
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Special pricing on some special mustards for you, our special friends! You can follow the link below directly to our online shopping cart or you can visit us online.
IPS100 Ipswich Ale Mustard (10 oz) – Grand Champion at the 2001 World Wide Mustard Competition. Reg. $6.50, SALE $5.50.
RRT101 Robert Rothschild Apricot Ginger Mustard (10.8 oz) – Gold Medal Winner at the 2002 World-Wide Mustard Competition. Reg. $7.25, SALE $6.25.
NOY118 Noyo Reserve Sesame Mustard (10 oz) – A chef’s favorite, with subtle oriental notes and a distinctive sesame flavor. Great for dipping chicken, fish, veggies. Reg. $7.75, SALE $6.75.
ELP100 El Paso Chile Company Sweet Texas Fire Mustard – A little sweet with some great hot pepper notes. Fun! Reg. $6.25, SALE $5.25.
BKY100 – Bucky Badger Horseradish Mustard (9 oz) – It’s how we keep warm in Wisconsin when the ice crystallizes on our noses. Always a favorite. Reg. $3.75, SALE $2.75.
Until next time – hasta la mustard!
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Copyright © 1999-2003 The Mount Horeb Mustard Museum. All rights reserved. | Mount Horeb Mustard Museum P.O. Box 468 100 West Main Street Mount Horeb, WI 53572 |
