The Proper Mustard - - - 'Yellow Journalism at its Best!'
The Official Newsletter of the Mount Horeb Mustard Museum ~~~~ October#2, 2007
Editor-in-chief: Barry Levenson  [email protected]
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THE 2007-08 CATALOG - MUSTARD ON A PICKLE

The new catalog is here and in the mail. If you haven’t received yours by November 10, email us ([email protected]) and we will make sure you get your copy.

The theme of this year’s catalog is “Mustard On A Pickle,” based on the mustard-themed children’s story by that title. You’ll find the complete story running through the catalog but we hope you’ll buy the fully illustrated version when it comes out in mid-November.

As for the catalog cover, once again we have spared every expense in hiring only the finest professional-grade models for your viewing pleasure.

FREE POUPON U DIPLOMA WITH PHONE ORDERS!

Why do businesses seem to discourage their customers from calling? Airlines, hotels, and others often offer deals and lower prices for online ordering. We love to talk to our mustard fans, so we are giving away a FREE POUPON U DIPLOMA with every POUPON U t-shirt or sweatshirt ordered by phone through November 30, 2007. Order two t-shirts, get two diplomas, etc. 1-800-438-6878. Tell your condiment counselor you want a free diploma and it’s yours.

DEALS AND STEALS FOR YOUR NEXT MEAL

Sometimes we like to find out if it our web site is working for us. That’s why we sometimes offer web-only specials, like these:

MX64WEB – Our “Tailgate Treats” Gift Box is everything you need for your next collegiate tailgate party. Save $5, online only through November 10. $39.95. Be sure to pick your favorite collegiate tailgate mustard to be the star of your gift box.

PPN900WEB – “Take a load off,” or something like that. Our genuine POUPON U Toilet Seat is regularly $28.00 but you save $5.00 through November 10 with this online only special.

MX48WEB – It’s the web-only version of our new Raye’s Mustard Gift Box, featuring six mustards from Raye’s Mustard Mill, a true American mustard icon. $34.95 in the new catalog but only $29.95 online only through November 10.

MX44WEB – Our new English Mustard set – two ceramic mustard bowls and two jars of English mustard, with a ceramic spoon. $16.95 in our new catalog, $14.95 online only through November 10.

MX58WEB – Our gift box of six Koops mustards is back. $19.95 in the new catalog, for you just $15.95, online only through November 10.

What if you call us for one of these “online only” specials? Do you get the special web price? Sure you do. As long as you saw it in this newsletter, we’ll extend the online only price to you. Just ask for the “online only” special with the item number above (i.e. MX64WEB, PPN900WEB, etc.)

See More Specials & Sale Items Here

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A SEVENTH GAME?

Congratulations to the Colorado Rockies and the Boston Red Sox for winning their respective league pennants. It’s time for another great World Series. Will it GO THE DISTANCE? Be ready for a Seven-Game Fall Classic with your signed copy of THE SEVENTH GAME, the Curator’s magnum opus on the 35 World Series seventh games. From 1909 to 2002, each thrilling game is brought to life. A must for every serious baseball fan. Regularly $16.95, now just $9.95 for Mustard Museum fans. BK77.

DEPARTMENT OF RED TAPE & FAMOUS COWS

The Mustard Museum applied for a modest line of credit at our local AMCORE Bank. After complying with numerous – and we mean NUMEROUS – requests for forms, documents, etc., we sent them this final letter:

Dear Mr. xxxxx,

In connection with the above-referenced application, please accept this notarized copy of a photo of Elm Farm Ollie, the first cow to fly in an airplane, taken as she boarded the Ford Tri-Motor in St. Louis, MO, on February 18, 1930.

It is our understanding that this completes the documentation required for this loan.

Respectfully submitted,

Barry M. Levenson

P.S. They approved our application. Which brings us to…

THE NEW FAMOUS COWS MUSTARD GIFT BOX

We have retired two cows from our Famous Cows Gift Box. We bid fond adieu to Bossie Alvarez and Beulah Thompson and welcome our two new celebrity bovines – Ophelia O’Leary (Mrs. O’Leary’s cow) and Ms. Lunabelle (the cow who jumped over the moon). The star of the show remains Elm Farm Ollie, the first cow to fly in an airplane.

Order your “Ollie & Friends Mustard Gift Box” now for only $17.95. Not only do you get three delicious cow mustards, but we also include a CD recording of “The Bovine Cantata in Bb Major,” the accompanying libretto, and an Elm Farm Ollie Greeting Card.

It’s MX56 – an udder steal.

KKK - WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?

The Museum has recently acquired a curious antique mustard tin: KKK Mustard. Why would a company market a tin of mustard using the name of America’s most infamous hate group? They didn’t. It’s called KKK because it was made in KEOKUK, Iowa.

Perhaps not the most sensitive choice of a product name but we can’t believe they meant any offense back in the early 1900s. We can’t think of any other American cities or towns with three “K’s” – let us know of any.

MORE ON THE COLLECTION

The Curator has been busy bringing even more pieces of mustard history into the collection.

This fine old invoice from 1900 memorializes the purchase of a half-barrel of Gulden’s mustard for nine dollars. That’s twenty-two and one-half gallons. Put it into today’s standard 9 ounce bottle and it comes to less than three cents a jar.

Here are a few more new treasures.

Your purchases in the gift shop, through the catalog, and online make these new acquisitions of mustard history possible. America’s Favorite Condiment Museum thanks you.

MUSTARD BITS FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE JAR

CHAPTER 11 FOR THE CURATOR?

Sounds like a grand idea. Details in the next newsletter.

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Until next time - Hasta la Mustard, Everyone!